This question came up after a conversation with my boss at the synagogue school, because she was trying to figure out a way to remind kids and parents about the value of building a community. I tend to speak without thinking (which is why I prefer writing, because it gives me a chance to revise my thoughts into something I can agree with), and I may have said something like, wouldn’t it be great if we had a prayer to say, in English, that specifically focuses on the value of being in community, so they can hear themselves saying it each week. My boss’ eyes lit up and she said, that would be great! Can you have it done before school starts?
The fact is, there are plenty of traditional Jewish prayers that imply the need for community, but I don’t know of any that do it explicitly, in a way that makes everyone realize that they need to show up on a regular basis to make the magic to work.
So, to start with, I need to figure out what I want to highlight about community in this prayer. The most obvious benefit of having a community, to me, is the way we can offer each other comfort and attention, and experience joy in each other’s company. Then, there are the invisible threads we create during those moments, that we can still feel later on when we’re alone, and that can hold us together through hard times. And, then, most concretely, there are the things we can accomplish together as a community that are impossible for any of us to do alone.
My next task was to see what has already been said about community in the Jewish texts, since this prayer should be rooted in the tradition, rather than floating around untethered to anything that came before. I went to a site called Sefaria, where many people have created source sheets on different topics, quoting traditional Jewish texts. It has become a very popular site with Judaic studies teachers, but also with anyone who wants to research a particular Jewish topic, in depth, without having to, you know, read a lot of books in Hebrew and Aramaic.
One of the first quotes I found was very familiar to me: I do a lesson with the kids each year on a saying by Rabbi Tarfon (from Pirkei Avot/Sayings of the Fathers) that has been made into a song: Lo alecha hamlacha ligmor, ve lo atah ben chorin le’hibatel mimena – “it’s not your responsibility to finish the work, but neither are you free to desist from it.” I like that it implies community, by saying that while we must do our part, and there will be others who can continue on after us.
Lo Alecha – https://youtu.be/04-tMMe4lrw?si=pKP4gDcRaubRIecz
Another quote I use each year, because it’s from the book of Leviticus (the book of the Hebrew bible that I study with my students), also showed up on Sefaria: Ve’ahavta lerayecha kamocha, “love your neighbor as yourself.” This is another universal value, across religions and societies, though it feels impossible to live up to, which makes it more intimidating than inspiring, for me.
Then I found a familiar quote from the Talmud, Kol Yisrael arevim zeh la zeh, “all of Israel is accountable/responsible for/connected to each other,” which has become more obviously meaningful again since October 7th of last year, though I worry that it could feel alienating to some of our interfaith families.
A quote I found that I’d never heard of before is from Rabbi Soloveichik, a modern orthodox rabbi: “a community is not just a group of people working together for mutual benefit, but a metaphysical entity.” And that’s much closer to what I’m looking for, because I want people to feel like they are part of something larger than themselves and that they are essential to it.
In my search for sources, I also came across some explanations for why certain traditional Jewish prayers (like the prayer for mourning) are only said when you have at least ten Jews together (ten men above Bar Mitzvah age, if you are orthodox). The idea that you’d need ten men to make a prayer legitimate always bothered me, because, of course, I couldn’t count as one of the ten to make a quorum. But now that I am part of a liberal Jewish community, where women do count, I’m a little more open to the idea that we benefit from having a group of people with us when we say certain prayers. The idea I liked most was: when ten people pray together the divine presence comes into the room, specifically the Shechinah, or the female face of God. There’s something beautiful about the idea that creating a community, even for a few minutes, brings in the presence of God. But it also makes practical sense to require a community in order to say something like the Mourner’s Kaddish in particular, because when people are grieving they often isolate themselves and they need to be reminded that they have a community around them to provide support and comfort.
A few more things I found, or imagined, because I wrote them down in my notes but now I can’t seem to find the attributions: God is the Neshama, the soul, of which each one of us has a small part. We ask for rain even when only our neighbors need it, and we ask for guidance when it is a stranger who is lost, and we ask for abundance even when our own plates are full.
But even though these are all wonderful ideas, I have no idea how to transform them into something short and sweet and to the point. I feel like I’m in danger of creating a Frankenstein-style prayer, and, if we believe Mary Shelly at least, those sorts of things never end well.
There are already some songs in our repertoire that I like very much and that capture aspects of what I’m looking for. Rabbi Menachem Creditor wrote a beautiful song based on a Jewish text, called, Olam Chesed Yibaneh, which he translates as “We will build this world with love,” and it emphasizes how people can come together to change the world.
Olam Chesed Yibaneh – https://youtu.be/ZHp-jcPlKIY?si=L8ieTeZ7z1g-397e
There’s also a variation on a traditional prayer (Ahavat Olam) by another Rabbi, Rami Shapiro, that has been made into a beautiful song by Shir Yakov (yet another rabbi, I think), called “We are loved,” which focuses on how we find God in our relationships with other people.
We are loved – https://youtu.be/ovj5HD1jUws?si=DGaNl2T04aAeWW_6
So, if I can’t write my own prayer, these are both good options. And, really, I’m sure it would be fine with my boss if I didn’t come up with something. In fact, since she’s currently drowning in a maelstrom of new school year details, I doubt she even remembers our conversation. But I do.
I worry, though, that not only don’t I know how to write a prayer, as opposed to a short blessing, I’m not sure if I’m even allowed to write one. Like, do I need permission from a rabbi? Or do I need to actually be a rabbi to write a prayer?
My answer to this thorny question is to avoid it completely, so instead of calling it a prayer, maybe I can call it a kavanah (the Hebrew word for intention or direction). When I teach the official prayers to my students, we do all kinds of writing (and singing and dancing and drawing) to try to understand the purpose of each prayer, and then the kids offer their kavanot (the plural form of kavanah) at a family service, before they sing the prayer itself. So maybe I can think about this as writing a kavanah, a piece to be read before we say the real prayers, as a way to help us keep the idea of community in mind throughout the service.
Here’s what I have so far:
We are part of a community that has existed for thousands of years, and embraces all of us, every version of us.
We renew and re-build this community with each word, each action, each gift of time, and attention, and compassion.
Each time we come together to pray or work or sing or study, we create invisible threads attaching us to one another, connections that can still be felt when we’re alone, and that can hold us together through hard times, like a net that will catch us when we fall.
We pray for everyone, because even when we aren’t struggling ourselves, we know that someone else is struggling and needs support.
We are all part of one soul, each carrying a small light within us, and when we come together we beam like the sun. Together we can accomplish more than we ever thought possible alone.
If you haven’t had a chance yet, please check out my Young Adult novel, Yeshiva Girl, on Amazon. And if you feel called to write a review of the book, on Amazon, or anywhere else, I’d be honored.
Yeshiva Girl is about a Jewish teenager on Long Island, named Isabel, though her father calls her Jezebel. Her father has been accused of inappropriate sexual behavior with one of his students, which he denies, but Izzy implicitly believes it’s true. As a result of his problems, her father sends her to a co-ed Orthodox yeshiva for tenth grade, out of the blue, and Izzy and her mother can’t figure out how to prevent it. At Yeshiva, though, Izzy finds that religious people are much more complicated than she had expected. Some, like her father, may use religion as a place to hide, but others search for and find comfort, and community, and even enlightenment. The question is, what will Izzy find?
rachelmankowitz 
your kavanah sounds good to me🙏🏼👍🏼🌞
Thank you!
You appear to have a great many springboards for beginnings. One task is to condense or summarize the most profound contemplations into one. Alternatively, you have the seeds for more than one prayer. You’re bound to create something meaningful to honor community.
Great ideas!
Wishing you good luck in writing your prayer! ❤
Thank you!
Rachel, I am always, always impressed by the thoughtful reflections you describe so beautifully in your posts. This one is a shining example, from your first suggestion to your boss of a prayer to encourage community (what an inspired and inspiring idea), to thinking it through so thoroughly, and then coming up with such a worthy prayer. You need to give yourself more pats on the back! 😊
Thank you so much!
This is lovely Rachel. I especially like the way your second paragraph pulls together the intention.
Thank you!
Here’s a thought from me as a liberal Reform Jew.
I don’t think that much about formal prayer. I write a lot of poetry and Creative stories to describe the feelings that make people want to pray.
Some of my writing focuses on the feelings of social isolation that many abuse survivors suffer from. This can be a way of praying for a sense of community. Think of what happens without sense of community. It’s more than a lack of networking. Much of it is a spiritual feeling.
I like how you describe everything , Rachel. You seem to be very much in tune with what community means. You’ve expressed everything with a ruthless sense of compassion. That’s the best way I can express my feelings in a poetic way. You’ve written something very beautiful
Claude
Thank you so much!
If it comes from inside our heart, God will understand it.
I don’t think God cares much about formal technique
Claude
Your prayer, or intention if you prefer, is beautiful and meaningful. I think you have captured a sense of community with it. A quote from your post struck deeply for me – “all of Israel is accountable/responsible for/connected to each other,” and can so easily be extrapolated to “all mankind is accountable/responsible for/connected to each other,” and makes me sad to know we may never see that. Prayers that your community will always stay connected.
There’s a very good argument to be made that in each prayer that “Israel” is mentioned, one could replace it with “humanity.” In a way, the ancient Israelites were meant to be the first step, the experimental group, to try to discover a better way of living in the world.
Indeed there is that argument. And they were successful enough that some of the lessons moved beyond the experiment phase.
I wonder if it was easier when the world was that small.
Much easier, and even then, impossible.
Sometimes I think the impossible is the easiest thing to do. Nobody expects you to do it so you’re free to take all the chances you need to accomplish your goal. You just have to want it enough to not realize it’s impossible.
I love that!
😊
It’s true that we may never see total interconnectedness acknowledged. Even though we are interconnected in fact, the fact is often not acknowledged.
This is all the more reason to work towards that feeling of connectedness.
Claude
True true – we are connected, and we need to recognize that.
Thanks!
Claude
Oh! From the opening lines of this post, I knew this was one was going to be special, that it would speak to me.
It was.
Thank you for sharing how this came about, your process and thinking, and the (current) result.
It is beautiful.
Thank you so much!
A prayer should ideally begin with thanksgiving
You have put so much work into this and have written a powerful testament to community. I love it.
Thank you so much!
Beautiful
Thank you!
You’re kavanah is beautiful, insightful, and meaningful – Your boss was correct – she picked the right person to create a prayer about community and your words touch people of all ages….V
PS I hope your friend with no fingers finds a friend with paws and nails soon!
Thank you so much!
Idk people pray all the time and call it prayer, a testament from their heart to reach out to G-d in times of need, I personally fon’t think G-d frowns upon anyone writing a prayer let alone calling it such. All the same with everything you write, just beautiful.
Thank you so much!
Amen 🙏
This is quite lovely Rachel. When I first saw your post title, I thought about writing from the heart, but there i a lot more to it, isn’t there.
There’s so much to think about!
Another great post. I love your conclusions.
I have a question. I seem to recall a Torah reading about not cutting down your enemy’s fruit trees. Am I totally misremembering? I thought you might be able to set me on the right track or id the reference.
I looked it up. It’s in Deuteronomy and you are remembering correctly.
Thank you so much. With all that has been happening I was beginning to question what I remembered.
Beautiful. ❤
Thank you!
Rachel
Your posts are so very with it to me. My own personal situation is having recovered buried memory of 60 years ago abuse. This was in 1960-1961
My memory came back to me in 2020, I’m now 71 years old. The past few years are a time of reliving my life and rediscovery. My journey is a huge mix of different spiritualities and therapies. I feel so glad that a big part of my journey is looking more deeply at the Jewish me, so to speak.
Your posts make spirituality and philosophy so much more than ideas, You breathe life into those ancient texts
Claude
Thank you so much!
Keep putting up your wonderful posts. I love listening to the wisdom of your heart and spirit. Tomorrow I’ll post more of my writing here.
I write a mix of shorter poems, short stories, and expressive kinds of testimonies I speak at hearings. I’ll just put up shorter poems he kind I use at Poetry Slams , which usually have 3-5 minute time limits.
Claude
Thank you!
And it came to pass, that, as he was praying in a certain place, when he ceased, one of his disciples said unto him, Lord, teach us to pray, as John also taught his disciples.
Luke 11:1
I like the idea and approach of the kavanagh as well, especially if there’s an official deal about a rabbi needing to be involved in a prayer. I enjoy and appreciate what you’ve shared. I’m especially drawn to the third and fifth parts (“Each time,” “We are all”). They sound like something folk of various ages and in various situations can embrace and say. Maybe the effectiveness, to me, is from the details in these parts that have the parts come across as little stories. Speaking of which (stories), I am drawn to the story of your dealing with this challenge. Again, the details–such as the conversation you had with your boss, the sources that you found, and so on–appeal. Your narrative voice as well, and as usual, engages. I wish you success as you draft and finish and share.
Thank you!
I’m not sure why you don’t think you’ve completed the task, Rachel. Seems to me that it has everything needed!
Thank you so much!
Yes, everyone is struggling, and the answer is indeed to pray for others. Beautiful conclusion. God bless.
Thank you!
That’s so beautiful, I especially love the part about our little lights coming together to beam like the sun.
Thank you so much!
Rachel, fascinating Post♥️
I came across the word, Tehfilla, which means ‘_outpouring of heart’?
Mine would go like –
🎶
Hold me Abba in Your gaze
Soften my heart to love
Pour thru my ashes Yr infinite beauty, YhWh-
Call me into Your ways
Yhwh, Gentle
Hold me in Your Gaze
🎶
There could be a tune here, na
That’s beautiful!
I don’t know what kind of prayer you are seeking. You may know this but I will share. The military has many prayers for servicemen. Some very beautiful. For example you could search for “Military prayer fo burial at sea” to see an example. Thanks for your time.
Thank you!
Hi, Rachel. 🙂
The 3rd paragraph of your beautiful prayer seems redundant to me. I believe it would be even more beautiful without the 3rd paragraph. Of course, it’s only my opinion and I could be wrong. You have to go with what feels correct for you. Try reading it without the 3rd paragraph and let me know what you think.
That’s so helpful. Thank you!