Kosher Food

When I was nine or ten years old, not long after my family started to keep kosher, we went to a hotel up in the Catskills for Presidents’ weekend. It was a skiing resort, basically, and it was kosher. I’ve worked hard to block out the skiing portion of the trip because it was truly harrowing, but there was also an outdoor ice skating rink, and an indoor pool, and a theatre where the last gasp of the Borscht Belt came to perform. But most of all, there was the food. They made fake scallops from halibut, cut into rounds, and whenever they were on the menu, that’s what I ate. The waiters were convinced I was lying about my age, because I could have had a hamburger and French fries, or spaghetti and meatballs and I chose this?

But I’d grown up on seafood, at my best friend’s house; mussels and clams and lobster and crab legs were normal for me, and I missed them so much.

Seafood! (not my picture)

Seafood! (not my picture)

I discovered fake shrimp when my school took us on a class trip to a kosher foods expo when I was twelve. The fake shrimp was at the first table as we walked through the door. It didn’t actually look like shrimp, more like a distant cousin. And it was sweeter, and didn’t have the right texture. But I loved it. It had been only three or four years, by then, that I’d been without shrimp and lobster, but it felt like a lifetime. And just the idea that someone in the Jewish world seemed to feel my pain, and wanted to offer me a substitute, felt very kind.

There is a lot of internal conflict within the Jewish community about how to keep kosher. I couldn’t have school friends over at my house in junior high and high school because my family’s level of Kashrut was not high enough for the orthodox kids. We had only one sink and one dishwasher, so that even though we had separate dishes for meat and milk, they were all washed together. We bought strictly kosher meat and cheese, but we only waited an hour after a meat meal to eat dairy, and my classmates waited six hours.

I would like to give the ancient Jews the benefit of the doubt that the purpose of kashrut was to look out for the health of their people, by avoiding pork which would have carried trichinosis, and using salt to drain the blood from meat to preserve it. They were also thinking about the most humane way to kill an animal for food, and checking carefully to make sure their people would not eat meat from an animal who may have been diseased. But over time, other things were added in by the rabbis and sometimes it’s hard to know why.

How did “don’t cook a calf in her mother’s milk” become don’t eat any dairy for six hours after eating any meat? Not only can’t you eat meat and milk together at the same meal, you can’t, ever, eat them on the same dishes. Just washing the dishes with soap and hot water between meals is not enough, you need to have separate dishes, and pots, and pans, and utensils, and silverware. Wine has to be watched over to make sure it hasn’t been used for a sacrament in another religion, which would make it unkosher for Jews. (Wine, it seems, absorbs blessings more tenaciously than any other substance). And what the, pardon me, freaking hell is Cholov Yisroel? Jewish milk? Really?

When I hear about gluten free diets and wheat free, nut free, dairy free diets, and vegan and vegetarian and lacto-ovo, and only organic and no preservatives…I think this is probably what it was like with the early Jews. Everyone had their own weird rules around food and the rabbis wanted to put everyone on the same diet so they could eat together. Because that’s what it’s all about, you want people in your community to trust each other and eat in each other’s houses instead of each family eating alone in their own homes and guarding their own individual rules. The fact that kashrut has become one of the primary things that separates different groups of Jews from each other was probably not what the rabbis had in mind.

My current synagogue is a lot less strict than what I grew up with. I would call it “kosher style” or “Kosherish” if I were going to give it a name. No one is bringing in crab or pork or non-kosher meat into the building, but food can be brought in from homes or restaurants where non-kosher food is also prepared.

Our rabbi waxes nostalgic, not usually during services, about side trips to discover lobster flavored ice cream (disgusting, just so you know) and Philly cheese steaks (much better!) on his way home from one religious conference or another.

From early on, my father insisted that my brother and I had to try all of the foods he remembered from his childhood. We’d go to a kosher delicatessen for turkey and chopped liver on rye, or knishes, or knockwurst, or hot pastrami with mustard. I assumed that Jewish food was always kosher, and that any food served in a kosher restaurant must be Jewish, like Moo Goo Gai Pan, and sushi.

One day, my father brought home ptcha, calves foot jelly, a cloudy white mass served with lemon juice, and it was abhorrent (much as you might think). Then there was Kasha Varnishkas – buckwheat with bowtie pasta, which tastes kind of like sawdust and dirt, with onions. Stuffed cabbage was better, because we could remove the slimy cabbage and just eat the chopped meat and rice mixture inside.

Ptcha (not my picture, Thank God)

Ptcha (not my picture, Thank God)

Kasha (not my picture)

Kasha (not my picture)

The kosher butcher always has aisles of things to try – like potato knishes, and blueberry blintzes, sour pickles, Israeli pickles, Gefilte fish, Matzo ball soup, noodle kugel, and kishka (which used to be made with cow’s intestine and stuffed with yummy stuff, until they realized that no one could get past the intestinal coating and another coating was chosen). The last time I checked, though, they did not sell kosher dog food. This was the excuse orthodox families used, when I was growing up, for not getting their kids a dog: animals bring treyf into the house.

My father tried to make that argument at our house as he became more religious, and we said we were fine with feeding Delilah, our Doberman pinscher, all of the steak in the freezer, if that’s what he wanted. Delilah was also a big fan of hamburgers and brisket and grilled chicken breast and sausages. When there was no steak left in the freezer for my father’s Friday night dinner, he gave in on the anti-dogfood argument.

"Steak?"

“Steak?”

If Cricket could decide what was kosher and what wasn’t, I think she’d outlaw kibble altogether. She doesn’t believe in the need for fiber or a balanced diet. She would also declare that all meals should be shared with your dog, or else the meal will not be considered kosher. If you eat that whole pancake, and your dog has not had at least two bites, you have sinned.

"I deem this dish: Kosher!"

“I deem this dish: Kosher!”

And Cricket said, "It was good!"

And Cricket said, “It was good!”

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About rachelmankowitz

I am a fiction writer, a writing coach, and an obsessive chronicler of my dogs' lives.

134 responses »

  1. Great blog. I love it when I enjoy reading something and actually learn from it. Thanks!

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  2. This week I just went to shiva at someone’s house that keeps kosher and so I brought a fruit basket so that it could be brought into the house. I was thinking at the time that if I had to keep kosher with my husband being celiac I would probably have to kill myself. It would be that horrible to me to have to cross-reference everything I did surrounding food. I have a lot of respect for people who can keep kosher in today’s American world because it seems so onerous to me. But I have to admit that I don’t like that the old kosher laws for animal slaughtering has gone from being a humane way to being a way that is less humane than “regular” slaughter. I have a hard time getting past that.

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    • I actually know a bunch of people who keep kosher and are also vegetarian or celiac. For some reason, once you have one rigid eating regimen, adding a second is much easier.

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      • I keep Kosher and am gluten intolerant- it is like keep kosher for Passover all year round. Not a problem at all! 🙂

      • That makes a lot of sense!

      • Vegetarian yes, but truly gluten free is very very difficult outside the home. At home it’s quite easy so there is that.

      • I’m drawn to rigid systems (but can only keep up with them for a year or two before going a bit crazy (just ask my kids). I totally get Luanne’s point about the inhumane slaughtering, but I think it depends on the processor.

        When I worked on an organic farm we gave tours to mostly Orthodox Jews who came up from Brooklyn. I was sort of jealous of their lifestyle and orthodoxy. My boss was an atheist who once was a devout Christian. He despised the patriarchal culture of the people who paid good money to teach their kids about farming and he enjoyed randomly slaughtering sick animals with a blunt knife in front of these families. Of course the families were horrified–as I was. I often wonder why any of the families came back for visits. (I was stuck there for a summer and became a strict vegan–for about two years).

  3. I always admired the intense practicality of the early Jewish people and their laws regarding food; it must have saved a lot of people over the millenia. Though I think it can get out of hand sometimes as you described so well. In France, we eat everything no holds barred. 🙂

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  4. Kosher Moo Goo Gai Pan! Love it!

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  5. Growing up, all my neighbors (including my best friend) were Jewish and I marveled at the fact that they could not eat meat and dairy from the same dishes. Just like they marveled that I could not eat meat on Friday. My cats would toss me out with their litter box if I forbade fish any day of the week. The cats also agree with everything Cricket said.

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  6. tumbleweedstumbling's avatar fulltimetumbleweed/tumbleweedstumbling

    Nice post. I can so identify. When my husband and I met neither one of us kept kosher. Our rabbi told us add something, make it your own and then once it sticks add something else. Over a process of years we went from everything to strictly kosher. We didn’t quite ever get good enough for my neighbour the local Lubavitch rebetzin to eat with us but we were close. Now that the kid are grown and we are on our own and especially while living full-time in our RV and often a long way from other Jews, we began to relax a bit. We are now I guess kosheresque. Some of the restrictions seem silly now. Some give us more trouble than any spiritual satisfaction we get out of them. If we in a place with a lot of Jews and we can find kosher meat, we buy it. Otherwise we concentrate are no pork, no milk and meat mixes, no seafood, nothing blatantly none kosher. But no Orthodox would be able to eat with us, which is shame but that’s how it goes. If we are in a place we need to start worrying about Orthodox guests again we can always change back.

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    • It really is a social thing, isn’t it? It’s also so much easier when you live in a neighborhood with strictly kosher grocery stores so you don’t have to think too deeply about it.

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      • tumbleweedstumbling's avatar fulltimetumbleweed/tumbleweedstumbling

        Absolutely. When we were camped in southern Boston I walked into the local grocery store and there were Haredim! For that month it was so easy to keep kosher. We currently live in a town of 75 people in rural Manitoba with the nearest Kosher store and two and a half hour drive away. We are the only Jews. We go to things like the local senior’s dinner and we just skip the pork and salads with bacon and milk and cheese mixes and that’s enough. That has meant a couple of dinner where we ate bread and salad only but that’s okay. We go for the company not the food.

      • When I visited my friend up at the bungalow colonies in upstate New York, the biggest grocery store was run by chasidim and they had every kind of ready made kosher food available. Really good sushi!

      • tumbleweedstumbling's avatar fulltimetumbleweed/tumbleweedstumbling

        I would be 100% kosher in such a place!

  7. A good friend and his family are very observant whilst my clan is the exact opposite and adheres to the principle that if it isn’t moving it might be edible on one plate or no plate. So lots of our dinners out end up at Chinese restaurants and sushi bars and gift giving usually involves a fifth of JB Scotch which for some reason is deemed a kosher Scotch.

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  8. Man-made rules, including the Jewish kosher food rules, are so tricky and shifting. I stick with Biblical and get a lot of flack for just doing that! Biblical is very easy, though. Thank you for a great blog entry!

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  9. There are different customs with the time to wait between eating meat and dairy, German Jews wait 3 hours in between, and those for Holland wait only 1 !The town I live in has wonderful Kosher restaurant- Sushi, Barbecue style, deli, you name it, and many people who do not keep Kosher eat in them – especially the sushi places!

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  10. Very interesting post, Rachel. I used to work at an entertainment resort many years ago and my best friend was Jewish. His father used to buy him kosher meat in bulk but my friend didn’t know much about cooking other stuff, so I used to bring the vegetables to cook at his apartment and he took care of the meat. We had many happy mealtimes together, and I learned a little about how to keep kosher. I’ve lost touch with him so it was quite nostalgic to read your post.

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  11. Inspired and inspiring column! Saturday afternoon – it is like waiting for the big page of the newspaper comics. And Cricket is so right! 🙂

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  12. Growing up, my grandmother had 2 sets of silverware but 1 dishwasher. She also loved kasha. I couldn’t get past the smell. We did have an incredible deli up the road with knishes, blintzes, pastrami, etc. Personally, I don’t keep kosher. I don’t even try. I have a very difficult time accepting some of the “rules” of Judaism. I recently found a reform temple. I liked it there a lot. ~Noodle’s Mom, Samantha

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  13. ramblingsofaperforatedmind's avatar ramblingsofaperforatedmind

    I had no idea! I would starve to death if I had to eat Kosher…..

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  14. Calves foot jelly makes me think of Jane Austen, for some reason! But after reading your post, Rachel, it doesn’t make me want to try it….

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  15. I’ve heard that in ancient history, there was a football playoff game in 1968 between the Oakland Raiders and the NY Jets (with Joe Namath). Since the game was being played at Shea Stadium in NY, it was (as was the case in those days), not televised in New York, Someone was going to school in Connecticut, and the Hartford station was not blacked out and a bunch of guys piled into a car to go to CT to watch the game in the college lounge. After getting there, the CT blue laws at the time said that establishments had to shut down on Sunday until a certain time (I guess to force church attendance) and eating establishments were included-EXCEPT those who had different relifious observances and were closed on Saturday. The group headed to a kosher establishment and someone of Italian extraction ordered a cheeseburger and a Coke and was told that this was a Kosher establishment and you couldn’t have a cheeseburger that wasn’t Kosher. “That’s OK, gimme bacon and eggs”.

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  16. I grew up in a suburb of New York City that was about evenly split between Jews and Italians. Can you say the best food in the world? Kosher delis and pizza places! We had two kosher butchers in our neighborhood and another down the road a way. Several kosher bakeries. All of that is gone now, sadly. In a way, I’m glad I live in California and don’t have to see it. These days, I am vegan, but not dogmatically so – I try to stay as close as possible. After a lifetime of kashruth, veganism is relatively easy. It’s an interesting sociological concept that most people don’t bat an eye when I tell them I am vegan, but back when I told them I was kosher, that meant I had to explain about being Jewish, which is tough for some people to accept. There is still a lot of prejudice, even some of it has gone underground to avoid the PC Police. It does make me smile when I see that many of the vegan products I buy are emblazoned with the U in a circle that indicates they are strictly kosher.

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  17. Fascinating post.

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  18. I don’t believe that I have ever eaten kosher food

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    • By accident, you probably have. A lot of things are kosher simply because they are not NOT kosher. Fruits and vegetables and grains and legumes cooked in butter or vegetable oil, rather than animal based fats. A lot of people who keep kosher will eat out at vegetarian restaurants, of any stripe, because they know there won’t be anything cooked in animal fat or with an animal based broth.

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  19. I really didn’t realize how regimented it was to be completely kosher. Everyone I have ever met has assumed I’m Jewish (I am Russian so I have never minded..) but I never knew what the diet entailed. You have quite a story here, especially from the dogs’ point of view! We are everything-vores but I do care about animal welfare and treatment. Grass-fed beef only these days. Thanks for sharing!

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  20. Catholics during my childhood were not allowed to eat meat on Fridays, so they were always fish and chip days. It is many years since that rule was relaxed, but people still choose fish and chips on Fridays.

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    • The fish Fridays I’d definitely heard of, but no one mentioned the chips. I think there are a lot of people who would be willing to have a fish day once a week if it meant that the fish was deep fried and surrounded by french fries.

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  21. Excellent post Rachel, so informative, but also extremely well written – This is where your writing shines, when you are writing about your Jewish upbringing, and your detached analysis of various customs is intelligent and unbiased. I love the way that you lead in to the dog’s opinions at the end, weaving seamlessly from Delilah to Cricket. This is a good model to follow, and gives a light touch at the end of the piece. – keep it up there IS a book in here eventually xxx
    A little note to derrickjknight – I am protestant, but fish was also banned from my house on Fridays also – think that stems from Irish ancestry.
    Back to you Rachel – I did not know about the dishes and dish washing and wonder how this is dealt with in hospitals (there is a lot of emphasis on not serving meat which is not Halal and respecting various other Islamic practices here, But I am going to use this article as a basis for discussion with student nurses on their practices with Jewish patients, with your permission>
    P.S. The photos with ‘not my photo’ made me laught

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    • I did not have the stomach to go and buy a dish of ptcha to take my own picture of it! I’d love to know what the rules of Halal are too; I know that there is some crossover, at least in terms of meat.

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      • As far as I can see, the rules are ‘flexible’ as for Kosher food. At the extreme, animals must be alive (not stunned) when the jugular vein is cut and all blood allowed to drain away while certain prayers are said, but supermarkets in the UK sell mat that is said to be Halal, but they sun all animal before slaughtering, and the only criteria followed is that prayers are said. But I am not an expert, so I am sure that someone can elaborate on the subject….

      • My nephew spent the past year taking a pre-college course in the ritual laws around slaughtering animals. It wouldn’t have been my choice, but hey. He’s sixteen, so he’s more interested int he blood and guts than in the theories behind why things are done the way they are done. Whenever I tried to ask him about, he focused on trying to gross me out.

  22. What a great post. You guys are the healthiest family on the planet.

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  23. You write so well, it’s so easy and pleasant to read you: you should be published, have a column on a paper or something. Fascinating stuff I always wanted to know more about. Thank you!

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  24. This was so interesting! Thank you for enlightening me about what kosher really involves.

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  25. My buddy, who married a Jewish guy, was recently asked by her nephew-in-law, Terry, if you aren’t Jewish, did you used to be Jewish? No, she said. Why? Because, you make such good Jewish food! At which point she had to inform him that technically, peppermint patty brownies aren’t Jewish, but he wasn’t convinced. He was pretty sure they were. We could ask Cricket, but dogs aren’t supposed to have chocolate.

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  26. Really enjoyed this, Rachel!

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  27. Cricket and TBO Chelsea have much in common when it comes to food – kosher or not!! 🙂

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  28. Working as a chef in a kosher restaurant makes one realize how insane the whole process has become. Sadly, it has a lot more to do with power and money than with morals or ethics…

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  29. Oh Rachel you cracked me up with this post. So many memories of my childhood. Thank you for that. My grandparents lived in upstate New York and they were strictly Kosher. When my grandmother, aunt and mother were preparing for a holiday dinner and I wanted something that wasn’t allowed on the same table, they had to prepare a spot on the table by pulling up the table cloth, giving me a paper plate and I ate my lunch. What memories. I remember my grandfather getting up early in the morning to say prayers and wrapping the layers of leather around him as he prayed. Unfortunately I don’t remember all the specific words to describe what he did, however, the memories are enough for me to last a life time.

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    • The leather straps were for the Tefillin, on the forehead and arm. There’s something about watching the wrapping ritual that’s just visceral. A lot of the most meaningful rituals have a sense-memory quality to them (lighting candles, smelling scents, swaying as you pray, eating challah,…).

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  30. When we studied Moses last year and all about the diet restrictions of the Old Testament, it made us appreciate how much God cares for us even in what we eat and how we care for ourselves. Many people today do not realize that much of what we do today is from God. Great post – like someone said it is fun to read your posts and learn something new. 🙂

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  31. Very interesting post on what it truly means to keep kosher! I love your insights, and of course Cricket’s input is always a nice touch!

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  32. I’m not Jewish, so I read this with interest but not the personal involvement some other readers clearly had.

    I think you’re absolutely right that religious dietary rules derive mostly from what was best available health advice at the time. The religions that are quite heavy on rules (actually in the religious teaching, not in cultural add-ons), Judaism, Islam and Sikhism, all have examples of practical rules that have been lifted out of their original context: for example, in the early days of Sikhism all Sikhs were expected to be ready to fight if necessary (women as well as men – in its origins it was very egalitarian) and some of the dress rules were about not wearing stuff that would get in your way if physical exertion was needed.

    Some rules have other bases – for example, slaughtering rules may simply represent what was thought to be compassionate and reliable. Some will be symbolic: for example, the Muslim turning towards Mecca or Sikh uncut hair (to do with the unity of God, I think).

    The one about wine not having been used in ritual amused me. Poor old wine. If it had been used in a Christian mass/communion service it ought not to have found its way outside the church anyway!

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  33. I am not Kosher or even Jewish, but I like to buy Kosher meats often for the humane way (I have been told) that they slaughter animals. Almost every recipe calls for Kosher salt these days… I never knew that the dishes had to be kept separately too. But I don’t know what I would do without my bacon cheeseburger.

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  34. My Sophie sets the same sort of food code in my home: If it is good enough for Sophie to eat it is ‘kosher’ for me! Otherwise, taboo.

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  35. Thank you for writing this piece! My friend and I were talking about this just yesterday (what it means to keep kosher), and your blog answered a lot of questions. 🙂 I also think my dogs would agree wholeheartedly with Cricket’s position.

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    • There are some very long and boring books filled with debates about the laws of kashrut, but my school thought only boys should be bothered with that. I prefer the Cricket school of thought myself.

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  36. I’m pleased to say that I never had ptcha foisted upon me as a youngster. My mother, who has always kept kosher (although not so much now that she is in her 80s), will be the first to tell you it’s the most disgusting food on earth! Then again, things like head cheese, chit’lins and pickled pig snout have to be even worse. Vegan forever!

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  37. Chicki is in total agreement with Cricket. Kibble is, well, the food of last resort… And it’s so annoying that we moms insist on dishing it out 🙂

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  38. I loved reading your list of Jewish foods…it’s fascinating and all the history involved in it … so evocative! Hunydog is on a kibble diet (partially because of her teeth…kibble is so much better for doggie hygiene than wet food) but she gets a large portion of people food too, so it evens out. She agrees largely with Cricket…until the dog next door comes for a visit and starts nosing the food dish…then suddenly the kibble becomes something precious to her. Such funny little creatures are our four-footed kids…

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    • We had an episode like that too! Two little dogs, on very restricted diets, came over to visit, and noticed some kibble dust hiding under the mat where we keep the food bowls. This one little guy lifted up the side of the mat, then burrowed under the nearby bookcase just to sniff a treasured kibble. Well, Cricket is no fool. She ran straight to that bowl and tried the magical kibble again. And then she gave me this utterly disappointed look, like, where did the good kibble go?

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  39. Being spiritual religious diets fascinate me and I can’t help smiling. This post reminds me of my days in the Congo when the army went into rioting, I had two great friends in the Israeli embassy. One Sunday (Christian Sunday) morning the one friend arrived. He did not say “good morning”, he simply asked “have you had breakfast?” When I said “no” he said “eureka, can we have bacon and eggs and by the way, good morning!” What ever the diet it is in the mind and did the two of us have bacon and eggs for breakfast, wow! Oh, at that stage because of security there were no family or non-essential personnel in Kinshasa, the poor men were left on their own devises to survive 🙂 We got to appreciate our wives!

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  40. Fun and informative. Thanks.

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  41. Ah yes, I know most of the foods you describe well, Rachel. Aside from the walk down memory lane, I so appreciate the information and balanced tone of this piece. I’d love to read you writing about Jewish death customs and rituals in the same way!

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  42. I had never thought about the reasons for establishing a uniform diet for a particular group of people, but your thoughts on it make sense.

    Also, Choppy is with Cricket. I am pretty sure she believes her tasting of food will ensure that it is safe for me to eat. And if not, well, she’ll be happy to eat all of it so that I don’t accidentally get some!

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  43. I really enjoyed this piece.

    Thanks!

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  44. That was really interesting! And crazy… the things we humans impose upon ourselves (as a vegetarian who doesn’t eat much dairy, I’m definitely one of them). Tillie and Elvis agree with Cricket and Butterfly that the only good kibble is your left-over kibble that the other dog is trying to steal 😉

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  45. well that was very informative and it frankly sounds hard… but as a Christian you know we are redeemed from the law, and i find it super hard just to go vegan, but all i do is watch a video on the horrors of factory farming and it’s rice and peas for dinner! Dr John McDougall has a book called ‘The Starch Solution’ which is a rather luxurious vegan way to eat… just throw in the towel and go vegan lol it will be easier i’m sure.

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  46. As a Scottish Presbyterian – living in Australia – I had this Scottish idea that New York was a three part city – one part Jewish – one part Irish – one part Italian. I learn a lot with these posts and the following comments and I greatly enjoy reading them. I suppose we have all eaten Kosher and I am of the school that believe Pastrami and Rye / Pizza and Chianti / 22 Year Old Single Malt are just to die for, though the Kosher element is beyond my understanding.

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  47. I’m with Cricket in this!

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  48. Fascinating perspective on keeping and un- keeping kosher. Memories of food really have an impact.

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  49. Everything you write is delightful, Rachel!

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