Blurry Vision

            My glasses broke. I’ve had the same pair of glasses for a very long time, because I like the frames and because my prescription hasn’t really changed in years, so I got lulled into believing they would last forever. As soon as the frames broke, and one of the lenses fell into my lap, I panicked: It’s the end of the world! God hates me! I will never see clearly again! I’ll have to feel my way across Israel in a fog!

“Oy. Mommy’s losing it.”

            I tried taping the frames, and then Mom went the extra step and tried gluing them, but it was hopeless, until Mom asked if I had a back up pair and I remembered that there was an old pair of glasses in my cabinet-of-lost-things and when I put the glasses on, I could at least see where I was going.

            This all happened on Saturday night, early Sunday morning, so I had plenty of time to wallow in my helplessness and ruminate on my inability to function in the real world and think about how useless I would be out in the wild (I don’t know where the idea came from that I would be dropped out into the wild, possibly by helicopter, to survive on my own, but I have always had this image in mind and have always been convinced that it would not go well).

            The next morning, we went to the Pearle Vision Center nearby (almost around the corner, though I’d never noticed it before), and asked if they could fix the frame (yes, but it would take two weeks and the fix would only be temporary), and then if I could get a new pair of glasses a bit sooner than that (since I would be leaving for my trip in fifteen days), and they said they could get the glasses done by Tuesday or Wednesday, depending on when I could get them a copy of my prescription.

            I chose frames, and then the woman in charge immediately chose different frames for me (probably more expensive, but much nicer than the ones I’d chosen for myself, and I was in no mood to quibble), and then she gave me a store card and wrote out the email address and told me to have my eye doctor send them my prescription as soon as possible.

            When we got home, I was actually able to find my prescription from the original-now-broken glasses, and I was able to send it to her right away and pay for the glasses over the phone,  and she told me I’d get a text when the glasses were ready.

            In the meantime, everything was a little blurry. I’m nearsighted, so even with the out-of-date prescription, writing and reading up close were fine, but there was no way I could read subtitles on TV, and individual figure skaters looked like fuzzy twigs. Fortunately, Hallmark movies, with all of their bright colors and constant sound were perfect. Driving was also, surprisingly fine, though I didn’t risk taking any long trips.

            It was lucky that this happened now, instead of when I’m away in Israel, but it also reminded me of all of the things that could go wrong and set off waves of panic. Except, while my internal experience of all of this felt chaotic and frightening, Mom said I was handling it all really well, asking the right questions, speaking clearly, making solid decision, etc. I wish my internal experience reflected that, but it’s reassuring to know that even if I’m freaking out, I seem okay on the outside. I just wish I could feel as calm as I look, because then there’d be so much more I could do. Anxiety is really exhausting.

“This is news to you?”

If you haven’t had a chance yet, please check out my novel, Yeshiva Girl, on Amazon. And if you feel called to write a review of the book, on Amazon, or anywhere else, I’d be honored.

            Yeshiva Girl is about a Jewish teenager on Long Island, named Isabel, though her father calls her Jezebel. Her father has been accused of inappropriate sexual behavior with one of his students, which he denies, but Izzy implicitly believes it’s true. As a result of his problems, her father sends her to a co-ed Orthodox yeshiva for tenth grade, out of the blue, and Izzy and her mother can’t figure out how to prevent it. At Yeshiva, though, Izzy finds that religious people are much more complicated than she had expected. Some, like her father, may use religion as a place to hide, but others search for and find comfort, and community, and even enlightenment. The question is, what will Izzy find?

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About rachelmankowitz

I am a fiction writer, a writing coach, and an obsessive chronicler of my dogs' lives.

68 responses »

  1. At least you’ll be able to see everything perfectly while on your trip.

    Art

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  2. I guess one reason I enjoy reading Rachel’s blog is that she makes me feel fortunate not to have all her problems!

    Suzanne S. Barnhill

    Fairhope, Alabama USA

    http://ssbarnhill.com http://ssbarnhill.com/

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  3. It’s always good to have a spare pair. Maybe another time you can get a deal on a second pair.

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  4. Your camera seams to work OK 😉 I have cataracts and they are getting worse every month❗️
    I cup my hand an peep through the middle of the fist I can usually focus pretty good. I was an electrician for 50 years, now 73 and wondering what I want to be when I grow up 🙂

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  5. Thank goodness this happened before your trip. Having replacement glasses will give you greater peace of mind.

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  6. it’s a test! I’m glad the new glasses will be ready soon.

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  7. When I travel anywhere I carry backup glasses. I hope there are no problems getting your new glasses and no problems when you are on your trip away.

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  8. As Anneli noted, a spare pair is always good. Maybe get the old pair repaired and keep them as your seconds. Great that the problem came up before your trip, though!

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  9. I was so impressed that you found the bright side in all this (that it didn’t happen in Israel!) Good for you! Have a safe and wonderful trip!

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  10. Glad you will be able to get new glasses before your trip. My last pair took four weeks and felt like forever.

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  11. So glad it worked out well for you AND before your trip.

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  12. That is great you will have glasses before your trip.

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  13. Oh my gosh, I broke my glasses this week too. What an unfortunate coincidence. 😆

    Now you can feel confident with both the durability of your glasses and how pretty you will look in your new frames!

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  14. Oh man, nothing I hate more when buying frames is choosing what “I” like and having the clerk choose what they think is “best” then don’t ask me to choose.always go with “your choice” because the best choice is only best because it puts more money in the pocket if tge sales clerk.

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  15. Glad all worked out. Just ask yourself if any of the worst case scenarios you imagine have ever actually happened? Probably not. Then don’t forget to breathe! All will work out as it is supposed to. Sorry, anxiety is like living in chains. I wish you well.

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  16. Oh dear! I’m glad you were able to order the new glasses. I hope you will like them even better than the old pair 🙂

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  17. Hmmm, this happened before your trip in plenty of time to get new glasses. Sounds to me like G_d is in control!

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  18. Your story reminds me of a glasses incident I had but sort of the reverse. When I had cataract surgery my doctor asked if I wanted implants to see near or far. It had been decades since I could see far without glasses so I went with that. Of course, it took weeks before I could get through a day without thinking I lost my glasses. I’m sure you’ll lover your new glasses and just enough time to get used to the new look and feel.

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  19. I’m glad you were able to solve the glasses incident before your trip. It would have been worse to have your glasses break while you were away.

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  20. I’m glad they didn’t break on your trip. I hope your new pair arrived ahead of when you leave.

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  21. You can get lots of cheap glasses on Zennie, before I had cataract surgery I had like 6 pairs.

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  22. I wore glasses from 3rd grade, until I moved to contact lenses in high school. Early contact lenses still were a bit of a hassle, but they suited a high schooler’s vanity! A few years ago, I finally had developing cataracts removed and new lenses implanted. That was quite an experience, and one I wholeheartedly recommend when the time comes. Quite apart from not having to mess with reading/driving/everyday glasses (and wondering where in the world I put them!) the better vision is worth it. I hope you new glasses suit you perfectly — you have a lot of new sights to see!

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  23. We human beans these days are not meant to live in the wild. We are too fragile. Can you imagine what a person with bad eyesight 3 or 4 hundred or more years ago went through? Crippling, perhaps at a young age. Almost a death sentence. 😱🤷‍♂️

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  24. through all the chaos you make us laugh 😂

    I love your sense of humor and that you can openly share your anxieties and still leave us with a smile.
    glad you got a new pair of glasses and that this didn’t happen in Israel that would be a whole other blog!!!! V

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  25. Anxiety is such a troublesome issue – keep working away at managing it.

    Enjoy your visit and I’m glad that you’ll be able to see well in your stylish new frames 🙂

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  26. Well, have a fantastic time in Israel. And meaningful. And I hope there won’t be insurmountable fog. I’m glad and relieved you’ll have new glasses for the trip and anyway. As for eyesight, it must be so upsetting when the blurriness seems permanent, even knowing that it’s not. Thank goodness, when clarity returns. As for anxieties inside, well, they deserve some clarity, too, coming to know what they are and finding steps to take to deal. I mean, what do I know, I’m not a counselor or psychologist. And I have my anxieties as well. Yet bon voyage, all of you.

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  27. I’m a mess without my glasses! I can drive and function but certainly can’t read. Glad you got it sorted out before the trip! Which skating were you watching? I was actually in Saskatoon for Skate Canada this past weekend and it was just fabulous!

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    • Seeing the competition in person must be awesome! I’ve been watching the grand prix here and there, but I’m not in skating mode yet for some reason. I still miss Kurt Browning, that’s how old I am.

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      • Kurt was definitely one of my favorites, and that’s not just because we’re both Canadian. I saw him on his farewell show tour last year in Seattle and he was still incredibly smooth on his feet. 🙂

      • Farewell show?! No! His footwork has always been something special, but his ability to light up a room is his real gift. I miss all of the professional skating shows they used to have on tv, where you could see the skaters grow and stretch in new directions.

  28. All the best for your trip. Like everything else in life – it all seems to work out; one step at a time!

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  29. The night of my wedding, after I was taking out my contacts, I couldn’t find my glasses. I texted the beautician, my family, my in-laws, my friends who were staying in cabins on-site. Nothing.

    The next morning, everyone asked how I was feeling, and I said “Not great because someone took my glasses.” When my sister-in-law asked this and I told her, she got an “Oh!” face. She had taken them thinking they were her mother’s, and never connected it when I had texted her the night before. *facepalm* All this to relate: I empathize!

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  30. I’m with your mom: you can handle stuff better than you think!

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